Not-so-Magical Universe

a place of craziness? yeah.

My Diary

Freshman (2009)

Posted on August 6, 2010 at 6:09 PM

Friday, November 20, 2009 -

So today... I know Shelly is already use to me and Amber hanging out. Awwh... crap. I like it when she's bothered whenever I am around Amber. Now it's no fun at all. ): I think I'm losing contact with Shelly... wtfudge... awhhh dangit. I want to be friends with her -- besttt friend. But, I just can't. Plus, I think Shelly's a little boring. Amber is hilarious. Amelia is funny, too. Uhmm, Gabbi went to Nicolette's house today. They are soo boring. I called them a couple hours ago (2 hours ago) 5:45 PM right now. And they were on Facebook (gabbi was playing Farmville) and they were just about to go outside. How boring as fuck. lol. They so need me. I'm the PAR in PAR-TAYYY! haha. (: Good day. It's Thanksgiving! Yeepee!! (: Shelly & Amber is going to Florida for Shelly's Aunt... lol, I was like, "...okay." It really doesn't bother me lol. Haha, maybe a little? Not so much though. I'm not attached to Shelly as I use to be. :D Improvement? Yep! But, I love being attached to people... Oh well :D . I need to get a romantic partner... I'm so bored & I want someone's attention. Thanks for today God! Oh yeah and Kevin is not going to retreat (Nov.20~22). It's camping inside a building or whatevers. Thanks for today!

Sunday, February 28, 2010 -

Wow, my laptop broke. All my kinda freshman stuff is gone. :( NO! ARGH! ;____; Oh well. I hope this computer doesn't break. My mom bought this growth thing. Wink wink. For the eyes, somewhere there. Anyways, yesterday was Amelia's birthday. Ever since mardi gras (which was a week ago), I learned to let go of being attached to Shelly – like I don't care about her and Amber together anymore. I would avoid it, but not like a disease. Anyways, it's a big improvement, but then when I detached myself from her – I also did with my fucking grades. I have all B's except for Theo and PE. Wtf. Im in beta club. I fear I will be kicked out soon. ;_; I went to youth group and church. Amelia had a birthday party today. It was FUN! One-pm to 4pm. I left at around 5pm. Lol. Amelia has a jacuzi and a pool! Built in! Shelly was there. Amber didnt go because of a project – mouse trap car one. I really dont know what to think of it – Amber not coming. I had fun with Shelly. I mean we sat next to eachother. Play Taboo in the back of Amelias house. (Oh yeah me and mommy got lost on iphone). Then we went to sing happy birthday in kitchen and watched amelia open her presents. I made a lot of people laugh lol. Shelly says she was bored whenever I wasnt there yet. So I was glad. Then when everyone was crowding around the table, watching amelia open the presents. Me and shelly sat on the ground. Lol. It was funny. And Shelly got a cupcake and moved the icing everywhere. I ate a rose petal that was edible.... It tasted like paper! BLEH! Then me and shelly played ping pong and air hockey. Then we played lilttle sally walker, after Elizabeth, Kennedy and Shelly left (shelly left at 4:02) or something. Then afterwards we went to see the goat. I met a boy – Nikko(?) he has a facebook. I'm gonna add him haha. And he is chinese. Hes has a gay vibe. And Shelly felt it too. Lol I step in some goat shiz. Haha. Then afterwards Nikko, Jessica and Amelia danced in Hot n Cold song by Katy Perry. Lmao. All those people from Paul Breaux. They pretty cool:). I had a great time! HEHEHEEHEH! It was FUN! :DDDDDD Oh yeah Kylin was tehre. Taylor didnt come. Or Michal Ivan. Or Lauren. The gilr in track. That Blaine possibly likes lmao. GOOD NIGHT! THANK YOU GOD SO MUCH! OH IN YOUTHGROUP we did the way of the cross! Sweet! And the watermelon on our island in the kitchen was red inside, juicy. So meaning we have goodluck XD! Awesome GOOD NIGHT GOD!<3Thursday, March 11, 2010 –Lame day. Even though I got in Beta Club. And in Rally. Two pictures. Yay. I may seem happy for people. But I'm not... anymore. Becuz of Shelly. Idk. We don't talk to each other a lot anymore. I havnt text her in three days. I feel sad, depressed. Whats wrong with me? Giving back iPhone and cancelling AT&T. Going back to Sprint. Bad day today. Hate it. I feel like everyone is just watching me. No one says 'congrats' anymore... Am I disappearing? What should I do? I'm sad. No one there to help me. Its always been like this. God, I Know your out there. But what about here? Not there. Here. Here is where I am at. Not THERE. Idk anything anymore. I keep saying I will give up or Idc or FUCK it. But in the end, it still hurts. What did I do to deserve this? Is this a test God? What do you want me to do? Do you want me to do something of MY CHOICE? Not anyone else's? I dont know God. I was always the lost child. Why is it such a big deal for me? FUCK HER. FUCK THIS. That's what I want to feel like, but why does it hurt a lot when I see Shelly happy and laughing with Amber? What can I do to stop hurting? Gabbi does not care anymore. Neither should I, but Shelly... she's stop the will to talk to me. Is that why I am


Friday, April 2, 2010 –

Clash of Titans came out today! It's a medieval fighting action movie! Looks so cool! Well kinda lots of things happen, pulled the bus on Wednesday in Physcial Science before the Passion Play. It was a fail lol. Lots of technical problems. Lol. Funny. I got a blackberry curve 8530... I think. Red berry in fact. Its easter break! Went to church for almost 2 hours (1 hr and 47 minutes according to Trong). Played a little maplestory. Uh, oh right, Shelly and I... not so close anymore. I guess the curiosity of eachother died? Idk. But I aboslutely dont care anymore! I feel great! Because I know I have more friends than Shelly. If Shelly is fine with just Amber. Then okay, cool. :D But they are always together Lmao. Even in pictures, but whatever. Haha. I have more friends. Not in a show off way. Just a way to make me know why. So chayeahhh! Everythings going to be alright! (: Thank you God! The content. (:


Thursday: May 27, 2010 –

Freshmen year is over.

Categories: school, life

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